[ She has to overanalyse because if she doesn't, they're all in trouble -- Mako can't afford to be reckless, because what if this translates to her husband taking away support for her father's company? Sure, her father wouldn't have made too much of waves about it because it's his pride on the line, but still.
Still, she'd wanted to do something for him, something that would make him proud. Mako frowns up at him, knows that she probably shouldn't have said that she'd wanted to go, right? That was a mistake -- it didn't mean it was any less true, but it would be safer for Raleigh not to have known that. ]
Because he would kill us. [ She says squarely. ] He would kill you first, and make me watch.
[ And Mako has come to find that the thought of it is unbearable. ]
[Raleigh could take her husband. He's pretty sure about that. While working for her has been relatively calm, he's not just a good looking body in a suit. He's got military training and would probably still be there if it wasn't for his brother's sudden death. And he could protect her too, that's actually what he's getting paid for right now.
So Raleigh's shaking his head at her, already dismissing that.]
[ Raleigh could -- but her husband has plenty of other connections, and what if one day he isn't careful? All it takes is one day, one slip-up, right? But here he is, offering her the chance of a lifetime, to leave everything behind and run away with him.
Mako sighs. ]
Let me think about it, Raleigh. [ She takes his hand, presses it over the slight, gentle swell of her belly. Their baby, she wants to tell him -- it would be so cruel to let him still be in the shadows and pretend that another man is their baby's father. ]
[He's quiet as he runs a thumb along her belly. There's a baby in there, their child is growing and oh. He wants it so much, to be a family with her and not be her dirty little secret, to leave that prick of a husband behind and be happy together. They could do it, he knows that they could.]
[ She regards him with fondness, allowing herself to get the idea of possibly spending her life with him in her head, to adjust to it, to the fact that maybe she really doesn't have to be here. It's a frightening proposition, but with him, it's easy to hope, to set caution aside. His hand is warm on her belly, and she leans against him.
There's still so much to sort out, so many things to get in order, and she feels so oddly...selfish and rebellious at once. ]
Two months, two weeks. [ She murmurs. ] I imagine it was that time in the hotel washroom.
[Like he could forget about that night. Raleigh smiles just thinking about it, the thrill of sneaking around, of getting caught up in each other and how it had to be right then, not a moment later and it had been stupidly reckless. Had gotten them to this point, where she's carrying his baby and they have some big choices to make.
[ She has to smile at that, because the memory was a good one -- she remembers the passion, the desperation, her anger at being caged in like some sort of pretty bird and nothing more. She'd loved every moment of that with him, the way she's grateful that the silk of the gown hadn't crumpled too obviously.
But that had led them to this, and now there's a difficult choice for her to make. She leans up to press a kiss against his lips -- in for a penny, in for a pound, right. ]
He'll be away until next week. [ She exhales, and presses close. ] I need you with me tonight.
[If Raleigh were a stronger person, he'd tell her no. He'd put some distance between them and stop this thing they have. But then again, her husband won't be back for days and it's not like she can get more pregnant.]
[ Does he really want to stop it? They're already in trouble, and Mako's choice -- whatever she makes -- is going to unleash a storm of consequences. What better time than now? ]
I know. [ She says when she loosens his tie, and undoes the buttons of his shirt. She leans up, kisses his jaw before quietly murmuring. ] I just like hearing you say yes. I don't want to be lonely tonight.
[ Even if she's right about her husband, she's not letting anyone hurt Raleigh. Over her dead body, and all that.
She slides the wedding ring from her finger and sets it to the side deliberately, leaning up to kiss him with a quiet desperation. She'll remember this, she'll remember this always. ]
[When she slips the ring off, Raleigh starts shrugging his way out of his shirt, letting it and the tie slip to the ground when she reaches for him again. This is Mako, this is the mother of his baby and he really can't deny her anything, even if he wanted to. Which is totally why he's nudging her towards the bed.]
[ It's two hours later that she's half-draped over him, an arm slung over his waist, and her head on his chest, a satisfying exhaustion settling over her limbs. It's become habit, that Raleigh sleeps in the bed she shares with her husband; that they make love without shame because nothing else matters but this.
But with exhaustion comes clarity, and Mako is thoughtful, tracing circles over the muscles of his torso as she finally decides to break the silence. ]
[He... actually hasn't thought that far ahead. It's enough of a struggle to get her to agree to leave with him, he isn't going to make plans until he knows that step at least is achieved. But does that mean that her decision is influenced by his plan?
Fuck.
Raleigh should feel guilty for sleeping with her in her bed that she's supposed to share with her husband but he really, really doesn't. She's his, she's carrying his baby.]
I haven't figured that out yet. Be with you and the baby.
[ Wholly influenced, not really, but it unsettles her that Raleigh doesn't actually have any of it planned -- she's someone predisposed to overthinking, to preparing in advance, and when she lies in his arms and considers him, his response isn't what she's looking for.
She's worried for him, because her husband can be a dangerous man when crossed, and what they're about to do would cross so many lines that it would turn very ugly very quickly. ]
...Raleigh. Maybe we should think about this again.
[Sometimes he wonders how they match so well. When she over analyzes almost everything and he tends to just wing it and see what happens and rely on his instincts. Her husband is a terrible person and a bad one to cross but he's sure that he could take him and whatever he tries to throw at them.]
No. What's there to reconsider? I love you. This--[Raleigh runs his hand over her still smooth stomach.] is our baby. That's all that matters.
[ Mako thinks he could, too -- but there are always the hidden odds, the probability of hidden unpleasantness that her husband doesn't tell her. They make a perfect, complementing pair, don't they? They can never be anymore different, and yet.
Her skin warms under his touch, and it's moments like these where she's tempted to wing it with him, to leave with him and throw it all aside, consequences and all.
She wonders if she regrets it, having unprotected sex with him all those nights ago -- but decides that it's too complicated to answer. ]
[ And in a weird, wonderful little way that is everything associated with Raleigh, it is. Mako is surprised and moved by how passionately he wants this -- and in a world where things came far too easily for the elite, he humbles her.
She shifts to catch him smiling, already sensing his pleasure. Kissing the curve of his mouth, she murmurs. ]
[Sometime later, Raleigh will really marvel about how this has come together. How it's seemingly impossible for them to be together, to raise this child like it deserves to be. Away from her crazy husband and all of the bullshit that comes with his money and business.]
[ Mako looks over at him, openly curious. With him, she allows herself to hope, to yearn, to want -- with him, she allows herself to believe that there could be a happily ever after out there for them. ]
Alaska. [He hasn't been back there in years but if they want something that's as far from her husband as they can get and still be in the country, that's it.]
[ It's one of the few times where she learns about him, and Mako shakes her head -- she'd never had opportunity to venture to Alaska, but she's aware (roughly), of what it's like. ]
No, I haven't. [ She muses. ] Tell me more about it.
[It's cold and barren if you go more than hour outside the major cities and maybe that's just perfect for them. Her husband would never think to look there, and it's quiet there and simple and nothing at all like this lifestyle that has her so trapped.]
It's cold a lot, yeah and sometimes there's days when the sun doesn't come up at all. But you can see all the stars every night. And we could curl up by the fire every night.
[ Because it sounds incredible, it sounds wonderful and Mako can imagine the sight of it that it presents and it would be perfect. She could spend her whole life with him and not regret a thing. She brushes her knuckles over his cheek, watching the way he talks about his home, and she leans forward to kiss him. ]
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Still, she'd wanted to do something for him, something that would make him proud. Mako frowns up at him, knows that she probably shouldn't have said that she'd wanted to go, right? That was a mistake -- it didn't mean it was any less true, but it would be safer for Raleigh not to have known that. ]
Because he would kill us. [ She says squarely. ] He would kill you first, and make me watch.
[ And Mako has come to find that the thought of it is unbearable. ]
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So Raleigh's shaking his head at her, already dismissing that.]
I can protect us. And you know that.
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Mako sighs. ]
Let me think about it, Raleigh. [ She takes his hand, presses it over the slight, gentle swell of her belly. Their baby, she wants to tell him -- it would be so cruel to let him still be in the shadows and pretend that another man is their baby's father. ]
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How far are you?
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There's still so much to sort out, so many things to get in order, and she feels so oddly...selfish and rebellious at once. ]
Two months, two weeks. [ She murmurs. ] I imagine it was that time in the hotel washroom.
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But he doesn't regret it at all.]
That was a good time.
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But that had led them to this, and now there's a difficult choice for her to make. She leans up to press a kiss against his lips -- in for a penny, in for a pound, right. ]
He'll be away until next week. [ She exhales, and presses close. ] I need you with me tonight.
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You don't have to ask, you know that.
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I know. [ She says when she loosens his tie, and undoes the buttons of his shirt. She leans up, kisses his jaw before quietly murmuring. ] I just like hearing you say yes. I don't want to be lonely tonight.
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Raleigh cups her face with his hands, directing her in for a good and proper kiss. Remember this, Mako, it's something worth fighting for.]
Of course I'll stay.
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She slides the wedding ring from her finger and sets it to the side deliberately, leaning up to kiss him with a quiet desperation. She'll remember this, she'll remember this always. ]
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But with exhaustion comes clarity, and Mako is thoughtful, tracing circles over the muscles of his torso as she finally decides to break the silence. ]
...What do you plan to do, if I leave with you?
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Fuck.
Raleigh should feel guilty for sleeping with her in her bed that she's supposed to share with her husband but he really, really doesn't. She's his, she's carrying his baby.]
I haven't figured that out yet. Be with you and the baby.
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She's worried for him, because her husband can be a dangerous man when crossed, and what they're about to do would cross so many lines that it would turn very ugly very quickly. ]
...Raleigh. Maybe we should think about this again.
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No. What's there to reconsider? I love you. This--[Raleigh runs his hand over her still smooth stomach.] is our baby. That's all that matters.
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Her skin warms under his touch, and it's moments like these where she's tempted to wing it with him, to leave with him and throw it all aside, consequences and all.
She wonders if she regrets it, having unprotected sex with him all those nights ago -- but decides that it's too complicated to answer. ]
Let's do it three months from now.
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They can't change the past but they can make the future better, right? For themselves and their baby. That's all that really matters.]
I'll start saving.
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[ And in a weird, wonderful little way that is everything associated with Raleigh, it is. Mako is surprised and moved by how passionately he wants this -- and in a world where things came far too easily for the elite, he humbles her.
She shifts to catch him smiling, already sensing his pleasure. Kissing the curve of his mouth, she murmurs. ]
Let's go where nobody can find us.
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I know of a good place for that.
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Really? Where?
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Have you ever been? I grew up there.
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No, I haven't. [ She muses. ] Tell me more about it.
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It's cold a lot, yeah and sometimes there's days when the sun doesn't come up at all. But you can see all the stars every night. And we could curl up by the fire every night.
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[ Because it sounds incredible, it sounds wonderful and Mako can imagine the sight of it that it presents and it would be perfect. She could spend her whole life with him and not regret a thing. She brushes her knuckles over his cheek, watching the way he talks about his home, and she leans forward to kiss him. ]
...I love you.