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[--oh. Some of this tension rolls away from his shoulders when she walks right into him and wraps her arms around him. Accepting without actually saying it, understanding without having to have an explanation. And he somehow loves her more, like a desperate little puppy, dying for someone to care about him, clinging hard and tight to the first person to show him that.

Raleigh's quiet for a moment, leaning into her.]

I couldn't find the words.

[ She knows. Mako is aware of what he needs, how deeply the damage runs even if she isn't privy to the specifics. The revelation of his past explains so much; the way he clings to her sometimes after they make love, or even when they're just cuddling, the quiet, desperate way he needs her.

Raleigh is a man not accustomed to being unloved and alone -- he'd survive it for awhile, but he wouldn't be alive, not the way he is when he's unguarded and happy around her.

She presses her nose to his neck, her hands rubbing his back slowly, soothingly; it's no wonder why he's so sad. ] I am sorry for what happened. For your loss. [ That he'd ended up like this, because slaves are not treated kindly, not at all. ] But don't hurt yourself. Please?

[No, they're not. And Raleigh's never shied away from that fact, but he got lucky with her. She's like the one silver lining from all of this, the moment of sunshine in the storm. Some days he can fool himself into that she outweighs all of it, that it's all somehow worth it just because he met her.

Today is not one of those days.

Raleigh's neck is throbbing, probably bright red and hot by now, even though he's stopped tugging at the collar.]

I would give almost anything to have this thing off.

[ Mako only grips him tighter. The depth of his anguish is indescribable, but she holds on tight anyway, her lips finding the painful-looking welts, yearning to sooth them, to calm him.

Today is the day where everything is shown with painful clarity, and Raleigh is paying the price for it. Grimacing, her fingers brush over his collar, fighting the hopelessness and the anger and the pain; she has to be strong for him. She must. ]

There must be a way.

[Raleigh shivers and he can't really say why. Just that she would lean in and kiss something so ugly and awful but that's also an irrefutable part of him, something he can cover up but never quite ignore. And she doesn't care about it.]

Yeah, if you have a shit load of money, maybe.

[ Raleigh's right; she doesn't care about it, doesn't allow it to put her off loving him in her own way because she's come to be in love with every precious inch of him, no matter his failures and triumphs because it's all a part of him.

She huffs a quiet laugh and shakes her head. ]

I'll finish paying it off in a few years. [ She'd been paying triple his monthly rate for some time now, in hopes of a more expedited release, but it's still quite far off on the horizon. Seven years, maybe ten? ]

[He sucks in a sharp breath and grabs her by the shoulders to push her back because what? What did she just say?]

You're what?

[ What? Mako looks startled, meeting his eyes -- why? What's wrong with that? ] Raleigh, what is it?

[What's wrong with it is that Raleigh had no idea. And that's a lot of money to be pouring into him and he's not worth that, doesn't she see?]

That's too much.

[ ...how can he say that he's not worth that when he's worth so much more than just money to her? Money can't buy the genuine smiles he gives her, it can't buy the way he kisses her, or the time that they spend together. ]

That's my decision to make, Raleigh. Besides, I have the money. It's not a big deal.

[Because. Because he knows how much his freedom costs and he could never ask that from her. She could buy a small country with that kind of money.]

Why didn't you tell me then?

[ Because a part of her has always known that he'd react that way. The alternative is to have him be indentured for a longer time, and Mako's found that she couldn't bear the thought of that. ]

Because you'd react like this. [ She meets his eyes. ] I'll take care of it, Raleigh. There's nothing you have to worry about.

[Raleigh's not really sure how to take that. She knew he'd react like this-- meaning that he has a point? That she's just going to do whatever she wants anyway and aren't they over that already? He thought they were past that but apparently they're not.]

Don't-- placate me. You're talking over me again.

[ It's a bad habit, Raleigh -- Mako didn't get to where she is right now by riding on the coattails of the Marshal's paternal affection; she's always been aggressive, a go-getter. She tries, though. But sometimes old traits die hard and things like this happen.

Mako frowns. ]

Did you want me to just sit by and not care?

[Well no. He doesn't really want that either. But she didn't even tell him that she was doing it because she thought he'd react badly. What does that say?]

You should've at least told me.

[ It says that a part of her knows that he'd say no to that, and she wouldn't accept that answer because -- well, because she just won't. Maybe he has a point there. ]

I... didn't want you to feel indebted to me. [ Imagine how much more difficult it would be before they even straightened all of this out. ] Raleigh, I don't need you to pay me back. I don't need you to owe me a thing.

Yeah, but I do anyway, Mako.

[Raleigh doesn't think of himself as a prideful person, a lot of his ego died with his brother but even then, it wasn't like he had to be right and do things himself all the time every time. Actually, he was pretty reliant on his brother for a lot and that was okay and it would still be okay with Mako if she wasn't making all of the decision for him and keeping things from him because she knew he'd disagree.

He gets it, the collar makes it complicated and he can't do a single thing to stop her. But she can't actually stop him from being irritated. Or feeling worthless.]

You don't let me do anything.

What can you do?

[ Mako regrets the words as soon as they come out, knows that she could have gentled them because it sounds far too harsh now. But look, the ends justify the means -- Mako paying for him is the most expedient way out of this, the best way she could keep him while giving him as much freedom as possible.

Mako had given him a comfortable life; Raleigh is allowed free rein of the base and beyond if he wanted while he bides his time for his freedom. Isn't that better? ]

[Worst thing she could've said. Without a doubt.

Raleigh stiffens like a cornered bear, like he wants nothing more than to lash out at her but he won't because to do that would mean the end of him, it's crossing too many lines, it's taking liberties he's not allowed because he can't actually do anything on his own. Thank you, Mako for the reminder, he'd almost forgotten.]

I don't know, why don't you just keep on telling me what I'm allowed to do.

...I'm sorry.

[ Raleigh looks like he'd just been slapped in the face, and that wasn't -- quite the way Mako intended for it to sound, not at all. She's just -- she's lost. It's the first time she's actually dating someone, and Raleigh being a slave just really complicates matters a lot more.

But now he's hurt and he's angry with her and she never meant for that to happen. ]

I didn't mean it like that. [ It's really, really hard, to swallow her pride and everything, but Mako's very much aware of the fact that she's really stepped in it this time, despite best intentions. ] I should have consulted you first.

You did mean it like that. Exactly like that.

[Because she's right. There's not a single thing he can do to earn his freedom, someone else has to buy it for him and he wants to be grateful that Mako's trying, that she cares enough to want to but it's so overwhelmed with the feeling that she's only doing it to prove another point. Maybe that's crazy and irrational but Raleigh's never really been known for being the most logical of people.]

That's been your problem since day one.

[ Prove what point?

Mako narrows her eyes, because what the hell, Raleigh? After all of this, he tells her he's got a problem with her ever since they first met? ] My problem since day one? What's that supposed to mean?

[Oh he's told her the problem before. He just made the mistake of figuring that they were already past it.]

Try and tell me that you haven't made all the decisions between us since the day Chuck threw me at you. And that you haven't tried to talk over me since then either.

[ That was practically a slap in the face. Mako hadn't expected that coming, but -- he's right; and there's no way around it. He's right, and Mako's been talking over him since day one.

She's silent for a moment, guilty, realising. But -- ]

How much of what you did since the day Chuck threw you at me was based on your own free will?

How about falling in love with you?

[Because you can't make someone love you and you can't control who you love either. She frustrates him sometimes, and she doesn't always realize how what she does makes him feel but he still loves her. That has nothing to do with his collar or his papers or his debt.]

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